Crash and Burn - A JMac FanFic <3

so, i think i'm gunna move this story over to the Mature tab ... mostly because of the change in Chapter 4. so, if you've already read Chapters 1-3, it's the same over here. i'll just update it later on with the newer chapter. thanks!



~ Jesse’s POV ~

“Thank you so much, Philadelphia! … And we’ll see you again real soon!”
The band finished playing a few minutes later, but I could still hear hundreds of the screaming fans from my dressing room backstage. Damn, those girls could really scream. At times it seems that they’re louder than I am onstage …
I collapse onto my bed on the tour bus 15 minutes later. We’re already on our way to another state, another crowd, another sold-out concert – only about half-way through this leg of the tour too. I don’t even know which venue’s next … I just know that this bed is the most comfortable thing in my life right now, and I could just about fall asleep any second.
But that theory’s thrown right out my open window as I hear a knock on my door. Groaning, because I really was about 10 seconds away from sleep, I pry one eye open and mumble for whoever it may be to come in. I try to sit up a little as Phil, one of my background singers, enters. Seeing as how it is Phil, I groan some more.
“What, dude? I haven’t slept a solid night since I think we started this tour,” I complain. But it looks like Phil has something serious on his mind, so I lose the inner battle with myself and sit up fully, leaning against the back of a cabinet. “What is it?” I ask a little more gently.
He sighs, then closes the door behind him, and sits on the edge of my bed … then, deciding against that, gets up and paces around the room. Which isn’t exactly a long pace, since all the back room of the tour bus consists of is my bed and separate bathroom. Finally, after watching him walk back and forth for the fifth time, he faces me and asks, “Did you call Kaylie yet?”
“What?” Now this is a question that I didn’t even see coming. “No … why, was I supposed to?” I was genuinely confused.
“Don’t you always call her after you perform?” He asked me this like he expected me to respond with a ‘sure, wouldn’t you assume I would? I mean, she is my girlfriend’. But the truth is, I haven’t talked to her in a couple weeks. After we had this huge fight the last time I called, I just assumed that she needed some space before I called her again. And, I didn’t want to have to go through another fight with her over the phone. The performances alone tired me out … I didn’t need her yelling at me soon after them. That is why I sighed and hung my head after he asked me this question. Kaylie has been the last person on my mind the past couple of days, and as bad as I feel to admit it, that’s the way I preferred it.
“I haven’t been lately … at least for the past couple of shows.”
“Why not?”
Now I look up. Why does he so badly want to know this? Does he know something … did Kaylie tell him something?
“Is there something you want to tell me?” I ask.
“No. I just … I mean, a couple of the guys were … We …”
“What? What have you guys been saying behind my back about this? Because, the last time I checked, me and Kaylie’s relationship was strictly between me and Kaylie. And I think that’s where it should stay.” Now he was starting to piss me off. I didn’t need a talk about this right now. What I needed right now, was sleep. And he was preventing me from getting any.
“It does affect us, Jess,” he looks at me, “when your performance starts to suffer because of it.”
“What are you talking about? The show tonight was hot … and the shows in the past couple of weeks were tight too.”
“Yeah, maybe from where you’re sitting … The rest of us, we can just feel there’s something off with you lately. The singing’s fine, the choreography’s fine, even the middle banter is fine-“
“Then what is wrong with me onstage?” I snap. I did not need this, one bit.
“Your presence. It’s just not there. You may be there, on the stage, but really, we can all see how you’re not. Your mind’s somewhere else, thinking of other things. And we think that the audience is starting to see that.”
I stare at him for a moment. Was he right? Was I really not mentally on stage, was I really thinking of other things …
“And you think this is all because of Kay?” I ask softly.
“Truthfully, man … I do.” He sits on the edge of my bed. “And I really think you need to call her and try to figure things out. If it’s been two weeks since you last spoke, that can’t be healthy.”
I sigh and nod. I know he’s right … Phil’s always right. But that doesn’t mean that I necessarily want to call Kaylie and open up what is sure to become Pandora’s Box – again. Fortunately, Phil can sense my hesitation and offers up something good.
“You don’t want to call her, do you?”
“I just don’t want to end up fighting again. That seems like all we ever do recently … And I’m just tired of it. It’s like, she has her life and I have mine. And combining the two isn’t good for either of us anymore.”
“So, why don’t you invite her into your life, then?”
I look up and can literally see the light bulb going on over Phil’s head. What does he now have up his sleeve?
“What are you thinking about now, Phil?” I ask hesitantly.
“Body Language,” he states confidently.
“My song? What about it?” Alright, now I’m confused again.
“That’s gunna be your new single, right?” he asks with a grin on his face.
“Yeah …”
“So, you’ll need to obviously make a video for it soon, right?” The grin grows bigger.
And now I’m starting to catch on and a small grin starts to form on my face. Great, so now if anyone happens to walk into the room now all they’ll see is me and Phil grinning like idiots at each other. God, I hope that door’s locked …
“I think I know what I have to do,” I state. I just hope that she’ll agree to it too …

part two of Chap. 1 ...

~ Kaylie’s POV ~

“Okay, girl … what is the schedule like for tonight?” Melissa smiles at me. We have just gotten out of one of Brown’s better cafeterias and are now heading down a pathway.
I grin right back and check my watch. “So, it’s about 10 now … and now that we have food, I think it’s only sensible if we head back to our favorite place in the whole world – the library!”
Melissa groans back at me. “The library, seriously?”
“What?” I ask with genuine question.
“We’ve spent the whole day in the library, studying for practically everything … I’m done!” I give her a sour look. “No, seriously. Kay, we need to start getting lives! We can’t spend every day and night hitting the books – it’s a Friday night for God’s sake!”
“So? That means that we can stay later,” I smile right back at her. I start to head in the direction of the library, when Melissa snatched my arm and I stop. “What? You know that we have exams on Monday.”
“Yes, I do know that,” she agrees. “But I also know that Ty Penningham is throwing a massive rave tonight at The Spot, and I’d rather we go to that.”
I think about it for a moment, but that’s all I really need to decide on my ‘no’. And since Mel is slowly becoming a psychic to my many forms of wordless expression, she can already sense the ‘no’ coming and quickly thinks up a reasonable argument.
“Okay. Here are the facts: (1) It is a Friday night, a little past 10 PM, and we both have our cell phones with us. (2) You have not gone to a party I believe since your Sophomore year, and I have not gone since … well, last weekend when I snuck out. But, that’s beside the point. And (3) we are both 21, have worked hard the whole day, and will not stay past midnight – giving us eight solid hours of sleep until we pick up the books again tomorrow morning at 9 AM.”
Damn. Those are solid points. No wonder Mel wants to become a lawyer – she’s kick major *** doing it. She’s already turning me around, and I had a firm ‘no’ already in mind. But now I’m starting to quiver over to the ‘yes’ side. She’s right – we’ve been studying all day, I haven’t gone to a party in two years, and we have all tomorrow and Sunday to hit the books again. And I’m sure one little party isn’t going to throw my whole plan of graduation with honors out the window. Oh God … here it comes –
“Fine,” I say and I can already see the excitement in her eyes spread to her whole face. I laugh. “Okay, lead the way …” As we switch paths, I glance over at Melissa and can’t help but smile some more. “Besides, I know the main reason for your sudden urge to go to this party.”
“And what would that be, Kay?” she asks me innocently. Such an act …
“I think a one Brad Gayheart comes to mind …” I smile at her.
She starts to laugh. “Okay, so he kind of invited me a couple days ago in the Quad. I told him I’d have to think about it, though, so I didn’t show any of your hasty no-nos you always write about.”
“Good,” I laugh. “Because you do know that those are very accurate.”
We walk a little in silence, until I’m sure Mel can’t take it any longer and has to ask me about Jesse. She just has to bring up the one subject she knows that I’m majorly sore about. But, the fact is she does it in such a way that I’m not mad at her for.
“So …” she starts innocently enough, “have you heard at all from him?”
“Not since the last time I told you about.”
“But, that was like two weeks ago!” She’s surprised, but I’m not really. Me and Jesse have been walking this line and doing this dance for so long – he calls, we fight, I call, and we fight – that I’m all-too used to it by now and any pause to this dance is welcomed. Is it sad when I’m happy not to hear from him for more than two days at a time, considering the fact that we’ve been together for the past six years?
“I know,” I state. “And he hasn’t called since.”
“You know …” Don’t say it Mel – don’t say it, don’t say it, don’t say it! “You could just call him.” There we go: she said it.
“I could … if I wanted to … If I cared.” I add that last part in silently, finally admitting out loud my true feelings. Even so, I hope she hasn’t heard. I really don’t need one of her mini-speeches right about now.
“Oh, Kay,” she looks at me sadly, and that’s when I realize she’s heard. ****. “You don’t mean that. You and Jesse are meant to be together, and I’m sure after this little rough-patch has passed-“
“No, Mel,” I stop and face her. “This isn’t some little rough-patch. This has been on-going for months, maybe even for years. We’re just not compatible anymore; he has his own life and I have mine. There’s no way they’ll connect again.”
Melissa looks at me for a moment, and I know she has nothing to respond to. It’s not even like I’m sad about it anymore, I’ve realized this for months and am more than ready to move on. I just … don’t know how to do it.

and here's part 3 of Chap. 1 - also in Kaylie's POV ...

As if on target, my cell phone goes off in my pocket. I take it out, and almost drop the phone in consequence. Caller ID comes on and I see Jesse’s name. Is this some kind of sick joke? Or, has he finally broken down and realized that this is never-ending, and he wants to do it first? Well, I am not going to let him have that satisfaction. Mel looks at me, then, when I show her the name, her eyes widen times 100. Neither one of us suspected this phone call. But, I have braced myself mentally for it before, so I take a deep breath and open the phone.
“Yeah?” I cringe at the snappiness of my voice. I didn’t expect that much to show this soon into the conversation.
“Kay?” I wince even more once I realize how much that snappiness has hurt him. His voice sounds soft, far away, like he thinks he called the wrong number.
“Yeah … sorry about that,” I say more gently.
“It’s … um. I wanted to call you because I had a show tonight, that I just finished, and I don’t know, do you remember when I used to call you after every performance?” I smile a little at the memories, but I don’t want Mel to see my vulnerability so I turn around and walk a few steps.
“Yeah, I remember. … You stopped.”
“I did. Um …” There’s an awkward silence just hanging between us that I want so much to fill, but when I go to open my mouth I realize I have nothing to say. Damn it, Jesse! Here I was, going to go right for the jugular and end it with you first … but now that I hear your voice again, I just can’t. Maybe I’m not as bitter as I thought I was. “Listen, I didn’t call to have awkward silences with you …” I laugh because, like always, he’s reading my mind. “I didn’t even call to fight. I think I’m done with that.” I can sense the seriousness in his voice.
“You think?” I repeat gently.
“I wanted to invite you to come down here for a few days … um, down to New York. With me.” I want to ask why, but decide against it. “See, we’re gunna start shooting for the next single in about a week, and I was thinking, I mean, only if you have time, and want to, you know-“
“What is it, Jesse?” I laugh. He rambles a lot when he’s nervous.
“I was wondering if you wanted to be in the video, as my co-star …” Wow. I didn’t see that one coming. I am genuinely stunned and cannot speak for a good 30 seconds. I hope he doesn’t think I won’t want to do it!
“Which … um, which song is it for?” I manage to get out. Mel is now coming over to me with a big question mark on her face. I smile sadly at her and turn around again. I’m gunna have to explain this to her eventually, but not right now.
“The song I wrote with your inspiration …” I smile again.
“Didn’t you write all those songs with my inspiration?” I ask coyly.
He laughs. “Most of them, yes. But I mean the one I wrote with your inspiration. You know, we were out dancing one night, you were usually grinding up against me – without my permission, but I let it slide – and then I stopped you halfway through because-“
“Oh, because you said you suddenly got inspiration for a song! To which I said, great! Now let’s dance some more …”
“And I said, sorry, babe. I really gotta write this stuff down.”
“And then you ran over to the bathrooms and started writing on a pad of paper with a pencil you found just lying next to the phone booths … I still say that was stuck up somebody’s you-know-what, but whatever.” We shared a laugh over the phone, and for the first time in a while I was truly happy with him again. I didn’t even think about Melissa, now standing in front of me with her arms crossed and not looking so happy. I turned around again. “So, it’s for Body Language, right?”
“Yeah. It’s gunna be my next single and I really want, again if you can make it, to have you in the video with me.” He sounded so hopeful on the other end, and I knew that most of it was happiness for not fighting this phone call.
“Sure,” I answered him. “When should I be there?” Maybe this music video will be the one thing to save our relationship … or, maybe it’ll tear us apart even more. Either way, I knew I had to go for it to find out.

~ Kaylie’s POV ~

“Wow, so if all it took was a simple phone call from the guy, pleading for you to come and see him, that landed us in New York, what was up with all the moody, angst you seemed to hold for him for weeks?”
We’ve landed at JFK, and Melissa has not stopped criticizing me since the plane took off. Actually, no, correction: the criticism started all the way back when I hung up Jesse’s phone call six days ago … and it hasn’t stopped yet. I’m guessing it’ll never stop until I break it off with Jesse, which quite possibly might be after/during these next few days of shooting for his new music video.
Don’t ask me why I even signed up for it, because I really could not tell you. Maybe it was something I heard over the line in his voice, the pleading and hopefulness, or maybe I still have that soft spot in my heart for him, that it hasn’t been turned into stone like I previously thought. Either way, I hate to admit to Melissa … at least at this moment … that I’m actually excited to be here, and even more excited to see him again.
“Don’t start, okay, Mel?” I turn to look at her, as, even though I have yet to answer her, she’s still been complaining and criticizing me down to baggage claim. “We’re here already, we get to spend four days for free in the city, and all we have to do for it is shake our asses in a music video, probably along with numerous other hot guys. Now, will you please stop complaining long enough to enjoy that?” I don’t think she expected me to snap at her with my answer, because suddenly she’s become a whole lot more quiet collecting her bags. “Thank you,” I sigh.
We finish collecting our bags in silence, which I hate because the tension is so thick between us that Jason Voorhees could come by and cut it easily with his machete. Luckily, Mel turns to me first and says, “Look, I’m sorry about all the whining I’ve been doing lately around you. You already know my opinion on the matter and I don’t need to be telling you again over and over. So, from this moment forward, I am going to sit back and enjoy this mini-vacation that Jesse has … so graciously given us.”
I smile, because even though she grimaced at the sound of his name out of her mouth, I know that she means the rest of it and that’s all I wanted to hear from her. “Thanks, Mel.” I give her a hug and we walk towards the exit hand-in-hand.
I immediately let go of her hand though when I hear someone calling my name a little down the strip of people coming and going. I look and, past all the other people, I see Jesse standing there, smiling and holding flowers. This huge smile immediately comes across my face, and I drop everything and start running for him. It’s like this feeling comes over me, and suddenly all I care about is being in his arms once more. “Jesse!” I scream, pushing past random strangers that I’m sure are giving me weird looks, but for right now I really don’t care. The only thing I see is Jesse, also running towards me. Jesse, who looks so beautiful right now. Jesse, my boyfriend, who I haven’t seen for quite some time. Geeze, could he be any farther away? It feels like I’ve been running towards him forever.
But suddenly I stop and our bodies collide in what I can only tell you is the best hug I have ever had. I jump into his arms and wrap my legs around his waist and hold on for dear life. Then, I don’t know what it is, but I start to cry. I wrap my arms around his neck and bury myself into the nap of his neck, and it feels just like old times that it scares me, because in some part I wish it still was. Also, the way Jesse is holding tight onto me tells that he feels the same way.
“This is so surreal …” I let go a bit and say to him. I look into his eyes and see that he’s been crying a bit too, though right now he’s trying to look away and wipe them discretely. I laugh and take my hand and wipe them away for him. He smiles and does the same for me. I look at him closely. He still looks the same … dark brown short hair that I love to run my fingers through, sea-green eyes that I could just get lost in, and a little smirk all his own. I bend down to kiss him. A mouth I haven’t kissed in quite a while. “I missed you,” I say.
“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” he says back.
I jump down, so I don’t completely break his back, and find that he’s also grown a bit taller too … or, that could just be me, since I usually wear heels, but decided against it today because of the plane. I smile again, and realize how stupid I must look since I’ve been smiling like this for over five minutes.
Suddenly, he pulls the flowers from around his back and offers them to me. “Um … sorry if they got a bit crushed,” he says, looking down at them.
I take them in my hands. A dozen red roses. “My favorites …” I look back up. “You remembered.”
“I try to remember everything.”
“But, you know what they say …”
“No, what?”
“Flowers say ‘I’m sorry’ and-“
“Oh wait! I forgot …” He goes over to the limo and opens the back door. Then, he walks back over to me with chocolate in his hands.
“… chocolate says ‘I love you’,” I smile at him.
“I love you too,” he gives me another kiss and hands me the box. I bite my lip. We have been apart for way too long.

part two of Chap. 2 ...

~ Jesse’s POV ~

Damn. I forgot how good it felt to hold Kaylie in my arms. We’ve barely let go since she arrived this morning. And now it’s a little after 3 PM, and we’re walking lazily down the streets of Manhattan hand-in-hand and side-by-side. There must be something in the air, because even Melissa and Garratt are holding hands in front of us and they just met a few hours ago.
I brought a buddy of mine, Garratt, along with me to this trip in the city because I knew that Melissa would be traveling with Kaylie and I didn’t want her to feel like a third wheel. She didn’t exactly say ‘thank you’ when they met, but the look on her face when she first spotted him was enough. Kay whispered to me that Garratt was all that Mel talked about in the Ladies Room at the restaurant we went to for lunch, so that seems to be a good sign that I’ve made a love match … because, Mel was all Garratt seemed to talk about while the girls were in the bathroom too. And they say guys don’t gossip about girls …
“Did I tell you how much I’m glad to be here with you right now?” Kay asks me.
I smile. “This is only about the 20th time, so I’d say no.”
She laughs. “Then … I’m really glad that you called me.”
“So am I!” Mel quips from in front of us. She turns around and smiles. “This is just what we needed … a weekend away from libraries and stupid books!”
“Ah … has someone been studying too much lately?” I ask Kay.
“Hey! I’ve only been studying what I’m supposed to … Just because someone would be much rather dancing at a wild rave-“
“God, Kay! I wanted one party! And you still hold that over me,” Mel fake-sighs in front of us.
“Since when don’t you like to party?” I ask her curiously. “That’s not the same Kay I remember …”
She rolls her eyes. “I still like to party! We were on our way to one when you called me last week. I just, have a lot of studying to do recently that has refrained me from doing so …”
“So, you would still be interested in going out tonight for the after-party?” I ask with a smile. I have been waiting to tell her about this ever since she arrived.
“What after-party?” she asks me curiously.
But, before I can continue, Melissa stops suddenly and stares into the windows of Roberto Cavalli, no doubt ogling some dress. She presses her face against the glass and then turns to Kaylie. “Kay! We have got to go into this store … and I have got to try on this dress!”
Kay laughs as Melissa runs inside, Garratt trailing behind her. But she doesn’t follow them, instead turning to me. “So, what after-party?”
“I’m performing tonight … at Madison Square Garden,” I start. But that’s all I can get out, yet again, as she starts jumping for joy. But I’m pretty sure this time it’s not over a dress.
“Oh my, God! Jesse! Are you serious?! That’s like huge!”
I nod. “I know. And, well, obviously you’re coming – both of you, and I guess Garratt now too … Anyway, after the show, the 40/40 Club is hosting an after-party for me.”
Her eyes go real-wide once again. “You mean, the same club that Jay Z owns?”
I shrug. “Yeah, I guess. I don’t really know how, but my crew just set it up. I think some vodka is sponsoring it too.”
She started laughing at this. “I just love how nonchalant you act about this whole thing.”
“Well, I’m more nervous for the performance. I mean, that place holds like thousands of people, and they didn’t tell me if it sold-out or anything, but even if it didn’t, you could still hold-“
“Hey,” she says, thankfully stopping me from my rant. “You’ll do fine. Don’t even worry about it. And besides, your lucky charm is back.”
I smile at this. She hasn’t called herself that in years … I was beginning to wonder if she forgot about it. Back when I was just starting out, she would go to all my shows and sit in the front row, and for some reason with her sitting right in front of me I would just sing all my songs like I was singing them all for her and I did awesome. I think she got a big cocky about that later on, because she named herself ‘Jesse’s Lucky Charm’ and had t-shirts made up and everything … but the symbol was not lost. She really was my lucky charm, and even though I did fine without her coming to my shows for the past few years, I had a feeling that having her come to this particular one was going to make it one awesome event that I was not too-soon going to forget.

~ Kaylie’s POV ~

Jesse and I finally had to part ways a little bit later on … at least during his concert. A few minutes before showtime, I knocked on his dressing room door and kissed him for extra good luck. Even though I could already tell that Jesse didn’t need it. He was completely in his element, warming up with his guitarist and doing extra stretches on the side-lines. I didn’t understand his reason to sound nervous earlier in the day; it was pretty obvious to anyone backstage that he was going to rock it tonight.
A huge smile appeared on his face once he saw the shirt I was wearing, though. It was white and simple, but had the words ‘Jesse’s Lucky Charm’ sprawled across it, complete with a red balloon (Jesse’s favorite shape from the name-brand cereal). I have had these shirts made for the past five or six years, and I guess he didn’t think I still kept some.
“Wow … really?” he asked, looking back up at me with a stupid grin on his face.
“What?” I asked innocently. “Oh, the shirt? You know that I still have all those made up. And I might have brought along a couple for the weekend … you know, just in case.” I smiled. “Is that a good thing, you grinning idiotically at me like that?”
He laughed, then pulled me closer … before a stage-hand came out of nowhere to tell him he had two minutes until showtime. He nodded, then turned back to me.
“I guess I should be heading to my seat …” I made no attempt at moving from his arms.
He leaned closer. “Did I tell you how happy I am that you’re here yet?” he asked.
I smiled and kissed him. “That would be fifth for the night … how about we try for a tie this weekend? I’ll see you after the show.”
Reluctantly, I pulled away and walked back to find my seat. Jesse had set us up with three seats in the front row, so we could see him and not have to deal with much of the obsessed crowd that he tended to draw each show. Even though we were in the front, I had a hard time looking for Mel in the crowd that was already to their feet since his little intro video had started to play. By the time I made it, Jesse was already on stage and beginning the first lines of Leavin’.
I laugh along with Mel and Garratt as the crowd around us – consisting 99.9% of teenage girls – scream even louder as the image of Jesse propels off the mega-huge cameras located throughout the arena. I know that Jesse is popular … that was plenty evident as the paps and fans walked along with us down the streets this afternoon … but for some reason, I don’t really think of him as a celebrity. He’s my boyfriend, and his job just so happens to be singing and entertaining hundreds of people every night. He puts up a front for all of his fans, which I can understand, but when the lights go down and he’s with me and other friends, he’s the same-old Jesse McCartney that I have known since high school – nice, funny, hard-working Jesse that would put all of his fame and celebrity aside in a second to spend more time with the people he loves.
It’s a wonder watching him on stage, now almost finished with his first song, because this is a side of Jesse I haven’t witnessed face-to-face in quite some time. I almost forgot what he looks like, putting all the emotion and energy he can into a song and getting quite a few screams and marriage proposals out of the girls because of it. I turn around and look at the crowd, look as they scream, clap, cry for Jesse. And I smile to myself, because I really had forgotten how amazing this felt.

part two of Chap. 3 ...

~ Jesse’s POV ~

I take a breath, and some water, as we pause between songs. I’ve sung five straight, and by this point I’m just begging for air. Plus, I know what’s coming up … I know it’s time for my serenade. Personally, my favorite part of performing. I begin to grin again, but try to bite my lip to stop it from showing as I look once more at Kaylie in the front row. She’s looking innocently back at me, having no idea what I’m about to do next. My band starts playing the cords for Oxygen in the background and it seems like all the girls in the audience jump up from their seats, each one of them knowing that it’s time for the slow song and one of them could potentially have me sing to them. I hate to break their hearts tonight, though, because I already know who I’m gunna to … and it’s none of them.
“Okay, I think we all know what time it is …” I say as the stool is being brought onstage. The crowd shouts and screams even more … if that was at all possible. “The question is, who am I gunna pick tonight?” A **** load of hands shoot up. I walk closer to the edge of the stage, but to the far right side. “You see, I already picked out which girl I’m gunna sing to earlier in the show … I just have to try to find her somewhere in the crowd.” I pretend to search through every set of eyes, then frown. “Nope, I don’t think she’s on this side …” I walk to the far left and do my act again. “Hmm … I don’t think I see her on this side either.” Now, I walk to the middle. Kaylie is already glaring at me and Mel and Garratt are cracking up. G must have slipped up, because I already told him of my plans before the show. I smile at her and she shakes her head back and forth, with her arms crossed angrily across her chest. “There she is!” I exclaim anyway. I know that when it’s over she’ll be thanking me for doing this. “Kaylie, come on up!” I wink at her and eventually I see the corners of her mouth turn up. She can’t help but grin at me, I knew it. While a security guard is helping her up onstage, I continue to the rest of the crowd. “You do not know this girl right now … but you will soon.”
She walks over to me and I give her a quick hug. “You are so dead, Jesse,” she whispers in my ear. But when I pull away she’s smiling and I know I’m in the clear. The last thing I wanted to do with Kay is fight while she’s here for the weekend.
“Could you please tell the crowd your name?” I ask, pointing the mic at her.
“Kaylie …” she answers.
“Ah … and now, will you please tell the audience how we know each other?” I ask with a smile on my face. I’m pretty sure half the audience already can figure it out, but I want her to say it.
She grins and turns to the crowd. “I’m Jesse’s girlfriend …” she says, and already I can hear the low rumble of ‘awws’ and more clapping in response.
Soon, the whole venue is filled with claps and ‘awws’ and I can tell Kay’s getting embarrassed as she turns away from the lights. I take her hand in mind and say to the audience, “Now, would it be okay if I sang this song to her? I know it’s quite selfish of me but I haven’t seen her in weeks, and I really wanted to make this trip special for her …” Without a moment’s hesitation, the clapping and screaming continues and I know I’m in the clear. I smile at Kay and she takes the stool. The music starts up again and I begin my serenade:
“Baby, you’re a star.
Unrolling out the red carpet for you on the floor.
Cause independent everything
I’m gunna give you when you come to my door.
And I made you the air I’m taking,
Without you I’m suffocating – I can’t let you go.
Cause everything as I don’t need around me.
I’ve been hooked since you found me.
Baby, look how I’m diving below.

Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Without you, don’t think I could live (no).
Cause baby I’m your advocate (yeah).
Girl you are my oxygen (whoa).

What good are money and clothes,
And million dollar homes,
If I ain’t got you around?
Cause see the thought of you gone,
Leaving me here all alone;
The tears start rolling down.
Let me kiss your fingertips and your lips,
Baby it’s something I can’t live without.
Cause everyone else around
Don’t mean a thing, I got everything I need.
Baby, in your love I’m swimming now.

Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Without you, don’t think I could live (no).
Cause baby I’m your advocate (yeah).
Girl you are my oxygen (whoa).”

At this point, I am getting so into it that I basically forget about the rest of the audience … in my mind, I’m only singing to Kaylie and we’re all alone on that stage. I belt out the rest of the song like my life depends on it. I can see in her eyes that she’s half-shocked, but also half-feeling the same way as me. That’s how I know I have to do this … I get close to her, on my knees and sing:

“One second without you, know that I’d die for sure.
On depending on you, I can’t do this on my own.
Everything else I can do without, I hope you know.
You are my oxygen, without you I couldn’t live.”

I get even closer, our faces are inches away as I go for the gold … my favorite part of the song, where I make the audience … and usually the girl I’m singing to … as uncomfortable as possible. I put my hands on her thighs and sing:

“Oh who … Oh who … Oh who … uh huh
Oh who … Oh who … Oh who … uh huh …”

Now I really can’t help myself and grab her hand, lean back and gyrate in front of her. I can hear the crowd scream, and in the back of my mind I know this is going to be all over Youtube tomorrow, but for now I could really care less. I finish with putting my head on her lap, and I can hear her laugh and run her fingers through my hair. The crowd is just eating this up …

“Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen,
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Girl you are my oxygen … Yeah.
Without you, don’t think I could live (no).
Cause baby I’m your advocate (yeah).
Girl you are my oxygen (whoa).”

At the end, I pull her up next to me. She wraps her arms around me and goes in for a hug … and that really sends the crowd into a wild frenzy. I touch the small of her back as the chorus goes on. We smile and I walk her off the stage, while the music and crowd plays on.
Backstage, we have a few minutes and we spend them making out. What do you expect? After that song, we weren’t just gunna kiss and hug and say, ‘See you after the show!’
I don’t have much time left, since the band has already started playing the next song, so I kiss her one final time.
“I’m glad you picked me,” she whispers.
“I am too …” I grab some water and gulp it down in one fast swoop. “We’ll continue this at the afterparty?”
She smiles and bites her lip. “I’d count on it …”
I bite my lip too as I am rushed back onstage. Even though, I’d rather be back in the stands with her …

new chapter! please enjoy Chap. 4, because it took a while to write it <3



~ Kaylie’s POV ~

I watch the rest of his show from my seat. I want to enjoy the experience with Mel, but for some reason my eyes are locked on Jesse. The only thing floating around in my mind is his name, and I have a feeling that I have this same stupid grin on my face during the remainder of the show, but I seriously can’t help myself. Before I came here today with Mel, I hadn’t talked to Jesse on the phone for more than two minutes in two weeks, and I hadn’t seen him in person for weeks before then. But now that I’m here and he’s here, and he’s right in front of me doing his thing onstage, and for once we aren’t fighting … I don’t know, I’m just brought back in time to when this whole thing first started. Everything was new and exciting, and that’s how I feel right now. Like I’m watching his perform for the first time, and then later on we’re gunna go to an afterparty together for the first time (even though this may be the 10th).
~~~~~
Well, even though this may not be the first afterparty I’ve gone to with him, it sure looks more crowded than all the others … probably combined. The concert ended about a half hour ago, and already the line to go into the 40/40 Club is stretching around the building. Mel and I took a separate limo from Jesse and the others because we wanted to quick go back to the hotel to change into fancier outfits. Which means, we’re both all dolled up in club makeup, wavier hair, and skimpier dresses. Jesse and Garratt don’t know, but before we left Roberto Cavalli’s store we set aside two dresses to wear later on. And now that we have them on, I realize that it was the best idea Mel’s ever had. The other girls waiting in line have on the same kind of dresses, so we don’t feel as overdressed as I originally thought we were going to be.
The limo pulls up to the front entrance and we get out, immediately harassed by bright lights and reporters. Ahh … they’ve finally realized that I’m Jesse’s girlfriend after all these years (probably having something to do with the concert announcement) and finally give a damn that I exist. I can’t help but laugh, but I know that Mel’s feeling a little uncomfortable at the moment so I rush past them, holding Mel’s hand in a tight grip, and heading for the door. I give the doorman my name and am instantly transported inside, where it’s not much quieter.
Mel and I look around in shock … I wonder how that line of people is going to make it inside, since it already seems about to burst. We walk along a tiny corridor until we get to the real entranceway of the club and I all but tumble over from surprise. No wonder Jay Z designed this place; it is filled with so much swagger and swank lights handing from the ceiling, disco lights that would probably blind me if I stared at them for much longer, a huge dance floor leading up to the DJ booth, stripper poles visibly in the middle of the air that girls are already dancing on, and a bar to the right the size of Lost’s island.
Suddenly, and maybe because Mel and I have been just standing there staring at everything, a man in a suit comes up to us with a clipboard. He would be big and intimidating, if only I hadn’t known him for years as one of Jesse’s bodyguards. But Mel doesn’t know that, which is why I think Jamal’s putting up this tough front. I try not to laugh to give away the surprise.
“Are you ladies lost?” he asks in this pounding, very scary voice. I can feel Mel shrink behind me.
“No, we’re just looking for the VIP booths,” I say. Jesse had told me to meet him there, wherever there was. The only thing I can see for miles is people dancing.
“Name?”
“Kaylie Adams,” I reply.
“And you’re friend?” he looks around me at Mel. She’s visibly shaking at this point and I can’t help but laugh.
At this, she turns to look at me like I’m the crazy one. “What are you laughing at?” she whispers, still trying to hide from Jamal.
“Mel, don’t worry …” I pry her from around me and face her to Jamal. “This is Jamal, one of Jesse’s bodyguards. He’s only pretending to be intimidating.”
“Pretending?” Jamal repeats in an offensive manner. “I was just being my usual, nasty self.”
I laugh again. “Yeah, right, JamBams. Maybe to annoying reporters and camera crews, but not to me.”
At this he gives up the charade and laughs along with me. “Well, it was worth a try. Come on, Jesse’s already upstairs.”
He takes me by the hand and leads up through a slew of people on the dance floor, and all of a sudden a stair case comes into my sight – something that was completely hidden before from us. We climb the stairs and go to the second floor, no doubt the VIP lounge by all the white and black sofas, chairs, and chaise lounges that surround it. A smaller bar is in the far corner, and in the back I see the kind of faux-beds that make up cabanas on the beach. Wow, Jay Z has really outdone himself. This place must have cost a fortune to develop.
I can already see his bandmates chilling in front of us, and sure enough Jesse is among them, laughing with his backup singers and holding a Corona. I can’t help the stupid smile from returning as our eyes meet. And then I see Jesse looking over me, seeming impressed with the dress I’m wearing. As he should be; it was an off-the-shoulder rainforest green mini-dress with a silver clasp and fitted bottom, and way too much money that I care to admit. But I think it was worth it, at least for the look I am getting now. I turn around to say something to Mel, but find that she’s already at the bar with Garratt in her diamond-studded black mini-dress. I smile and turn back around, only to find Jesse already standing in front of me.
“Hey,” I say.
“Hey,” he smiles.
But, before he makes his move, I interrupt him, saying, “You know, there were a lot of reporters out there.”
“Yeah, that happens,” he says as he tries to lead me to the bar. But I hold my ground.
“And they all seemed to be quite interested in me,” I mention. He nods his head, wrapping a hand around my waist and still pulling me. “Why do you suppose that is?”
“I may have … uh, mentioned you in a couple of my interviews out there,” he tries to make it sound casual, but I smile because I know what this means. “I didn’t tell them much,” he quickly adds, seeing my reaction. “Just that we’re obviously together and that you’re gunna be in the new video.”
“Oh, so that’s it?”
“Yeah …” He looks at me more seriously. “You know that I try to keep my personal life private from those people.”
I smile. “I know. I just wanted to make sure you still did.”

and part two ... i know this could've gone with the other part of Chap. 4, but i thought because the change of POV, it deserved its own section. haha

~ Jesse’s POV ~

An hour or so later, I grab Kay’s hand and lead her to the dance floor. She happily obliges. I don’t know what exactly it is … could be all the sweaty people around us, grinding on each other, could be the mesmerizing lights above and all around us, casting an effect on the crowd, or it could just be the beer and the thought that we haven’t been together in months … but whatever it is, causes me to grab onto her once we find room among the others and never want to let go. She turns around and begins to move against me. I wrap my arms around her waist and she wraps her arms around my neck. As the beat moves on … some new slower song by a white rapper named Cage … we move closer, if that’s at all possible.
I look around for a second and spot Mel and G by themselves in a corner of the club, and have to smile because I know how much G wanted to get some play tonight. Good thing we have separate hotel rooms …
I look back down at Kaylie. Her eyes are closed, absorbing the music around her. I love watching her when she’s in her element. She says she’s an English major, but I think that was all about her parents. She wanted to get into music, but because there is no “stable job” in the music industry, her mom and dad convinced her to go the English-Education track. What a shame …
She starts rubbing closer to me, moving her hands down from my neck and shoulders till they land on top of mine, still clenched at her waist. She moves them for me downward, past her pelvis until they grab onto the edge of her mini-dress and pull upward. She starts to smile and opens her eyes to stare into mine. I know that stare. I give her the same one back. She nods and I smile even more. I look around fleetingly for G and Mel, but they’re already gone from their hiding place and are probably halfway to the hotel by now.
And, in a manner of five minutes, so are we.

Post more soon

okay - next chapter, coming your way!! but i want a few more reviews before i get to the next one. haha thank you!!



~ Jesse’s POV ~

It’s morning, and a very loud beeping wakes me up at 9 AM. I clutch my eyes, and turn over in an attempt to stop the noise without having to open my eyes or do any other sort of movement. I groan into my pillow after a few minutes when it hasn’t stopped. Where is Garratt??
Oh yeah … I can’t help but smile to myself. Then I do open my eyes and search the room. Where is Kaylie?? God, and why are the curtains open already? The sun is already blinding, and it’s not even noon. I stumble out of bed, reach for my boxers that are lying on the floor, and quickly pull the window shades down again and pull back across the heavy curtains.
“Hey! I did that for a reason.” Kaylie’s voice from behind me. I turn and see her wrapped in a towel, drying her hair with another. Oh, that’s where she was … the shower. Someplace I’m sure to visit soon.
“Hey,” I smile lazily at her. I get out a yawn before she comes over and gives me a kiss.
“’Morning,” she smiles brightly. I forgot how cheerful she is in the morning. I do remember Kaylie getting up every morning at 8:30 AM no matter what the day’s schedule called for. And then visions of her trying to pry me from my bed come and I can’t help but smile once more. Some things never change, I guess. She goes to the closet and starts to get ready, but I walk up behind her and stop her. I spin her around and kiss her again, this one a bit longer than the last. “Hey,” she smiles. Then, “You should really get a shower soon. I think we have to meet everyone downstairs in a half hour.”
“Yeah, I know,” I say, but make no attempt at moving towards the bathroom. I want to hold her a bit longer.
“Is there something else?” she asks, obviously wanting to get a move-on. She was also very anal about staying on time.
“Just, wanted to say that I had a lot of fun last night …”
This causes her to give another shy smile. “Yeah, I did too. I missed that.”
“Ditto.” I go in for another kiss.
But, after a minute of making out, she shoves me aside and says, “Jess, you should really get going.”
I roll my eyes. “Yeah, yeah,” I mumble. She laughs and turns back to the closet. I grab another pair of boxers from my side of the closet and go to the bathroom door, without first turning back around and slapping her on the ***.
“Hey!” she yelps. I smile even more, because I know how much she liked that.

~ Kaylie’s POV ~

I’m sitting here, at my make-up chair, sipping from my Orange Juice and talking to Melissa, who is just on the other side of the mirror from me in her own make-up chair, via text message. We didn’t feel like yelling across the way, this early in the morning and about the subject matter that we’re discussing. Not like it would matter, I mean, obviously the men doing our hair and make-up would love a good girl chat, but we just have our ways. I’m pretty sure Ronald, my hair dresser, is reading our conversation over my shoulder anyway.
“So, was it totally worth the wait??” she asks.
I smile. “Totally.” I can hear her little squeal across the way. “What about you and Garratt … ??” I text back.
“Totally … ” This time I squeal.
“What time did you guys go to bed?”
“Um, around 11 … but we weren’t sleeping until 3 AM ” I can’t help but laugh at that.
“Pretty much the same for me.”
“I take back whatever I may have said about J before. He’s AWESOME for doing all of this for us!!”
“Yeah, you mean mostly about hooking you up with G,” I text.
“Not totally … It will be pretty cool to shoot this video!”
I sigh. “Yeah, if we ever get out of these chairs …”
“Hey!” I hear Ronald from behind me. “We’re working as fast as we can! This director just wanted a specific look that may take a little longer.”
Yep, I knew it; Ronald was reading over my shoulder. I can hear Mel laughing on the other side.
“I guess there’s no use in texting anymore, Mel!” I yell to her.
“Yeah, Christian over here’s been reading the whole time too!” she yells back, and to that we both break into a fit of laughter.
But really, I feel like I’ve been sitting in this chair since the moment I arrived on set with Jesse. A quick glance at my cell phone shows the time: 11:27 AM. Yep, I’ve been sitting here for the better half of two hours … And it’s not like we can even see what they’re doing to us. They put a blanket up over all the mirrors in the room, so we’re going into this video blind. The only info we got when we first sat down and the director, Kevin Bates, visited us was that the majority of this video took place in a club, with a lot of other dancers around us, and that Jesse was directing most of his lines in the video toward me, the star girl. Mel was just another extra in the background. My thoughts? Okay, nice idea … which kind of already happened last night, and last night I surely did not have two hours worth of make-up on my face. So, what the hell were they exactly going for here?? I mean, by this time, they probably wouldn’t even start shooting until after lunch and then-
“Alright, people! That’s lunch!” Ronnie, the video manager stuck his head into the trailer and looked at us. “Girls, you can go and meet the guys down at the craft services table and we’ll do a little touch up before the shoot in an hour.”
Perfect. So, all this done and we were just gunna have to wait until after lunch to even start filming. Whose brain idea was that? We didn’t even know what our outfits were yet … Although, Jesse texted me a few minutes ago to warn me they had something to do with lace and leather. So, basically the outfit I shared with Jesse last night.


~ Jesse’s POV ~

Shortly after lunch, the girls go back to the hair and make-up trailer for round two and Garratt and I head back to my trailer so I can get changed into my first outfit. I feel so bad for Kay and Mel. They are both naturally beautiful girls, who don’t wear a lot of make-up just because they don’t need to, and Ronald and Christian are making them sit in chairs for hours just to go over the features they already have. I texted Kaylie before, and she told me that they both hated it. But I’m hoping the outfits they’re wearing will make up for it. I caught a glimpse of one of them earlier, and I can tell Kay’s gunna feel right at home wearing it. Plus, Kevin already told me that they can keep them, so I’m hoping that when I tell them that they’ll feel 100 percent better.
“So, how did things go with Mel last night?” I ask G as I’m being fitted. This is the worst part of making a video for me, and it’s nice to have one of my best buddies in the room to distract me from all the nicking and prodding of the tailor. He’s been smiling all morning, so I know it went great.
“Awesome,” he smiles again. “Thanks again, dude, for bringing me along for this trip. I know we both would’ve been bored out of our minds if we hadn’t met.”
“Yeah, no problem. I’m hoping you’re the one thing Mel can say positively about me,” I chuckle.
“Don’t worry. After last night, you are definitely on her good side. So, I’m assuming things also went well with Kay?”
“Oh yeah,” I smile. “It felt great being with her again, so natural, like we hadn’t been apart for months before.”
“And hey, I heard from Phil that you even seemed to perform better at your concert,” Garratt interjected.
I thought about this for a second. “Yeah, I guess he said that I wasn’t doing the best before … And that’s also part of the reason that I decided to invite Kay along this time. Phil and some of the others were thinking that because I really missed Kay, that I wasn’t giving my all to the shows. Which, now that I think about it, was right, I guess. It wasn’t even that I missed her, because I missed her a lot in the past and I was fine on stage, it was that we were fighting a lot and I missed her. I think all that kind of caused me to not care as much during the shows. … Anyway, I’m just glad that she’s back in my life,” I ended with a smile.
I could see a big question mark take over G’s face, and I couldn’t blame him. I hadn’t told me all that stuff about my show’s suffering before, and I think I might have royally confused him. But, it didn’t matter. I know what happened in the past, and I really think that now that I have Kaylie back in my life – physically and mentally – they won’t suffer any longer.

So good Pms!

stinemarie wrote:So good Pms!

um..thats kinda funny what ya wrote,cause it looks like you wrote PMS,not pm's!

JesseMacNY wrote:

stinemarie wrote:So good Pms!

um..thats kinda funny what ya wrote,cause it looks like you wrote PMS,not pm's!

Haha ops

stinemarie wrote:

JesseMacNY wrote:

stinemarie wrote:So good Pms!

um..thats kinda funny what ya wrote,cause it looks like you wrote PMS,not pm's!

Haha ops

hehe....yea i make mistakes like that too!!dont worry!